Recently I am reminded of how expectations can make a person so dissatisfied with life, not necessary unhappy, just dissatisfied, because we're left with wanting more.
At the same time, there's the argument that if you don't expect stuff, there's no striving to work towards making things better.
So how now brown cow?
Life equations are not the most solvable, and there's not scientific calculator, neither will Google or SIRI give a satisfying answer. haha.
Guy doesn't call Girl all the time, and instead falls asleep.
Girl gets annoyed but she doesn't know that he's tired from working and is trying to conserve energy so that when they actually talk, he can pay attention.
Girl calls Guy more times than likes.
Guy gets annoyed but he doesn't realise she just wants to hear his voice because it has been a horrible day at work, and that she's hoping to feel some security.
It's debatable. Guy can try to practice sleeping less, Girl can practice dealing with problems in ways other than voicing it out.
But that's how Guy has always been, he needs a lot of rest and that's how Girl has always been, she really likes to share.
Our expectations shape how we look at things.
Falling in love with an emotional guy can be so romantic, 6 months later, bloody hell he's so clingy ugh!
Falling in love with a spontaneous girl is so fun, 6 months later, bugger where she get all the energy?
Falling in love with a guy who is not clingy is so much freedom yay, 6 months later, omg he never cares!
Falling in love with a girl who is analytical is so attractive with those intelligent conversations, 6 months later, why on earth you always think so much?
6 months is just a number that popped in my head, no evidence that the above has to happen after 6 months.
Because our expectations change, and we may not even realise that. The lil things that were so attractive suddenly annoy us most. Do we then back down with our expectations or work towards changing the person?
We're not unhappy, probably still kiss and make out, but boy oh boy are we so often dissatisfied and wonder if this can actually work out because if not, we're losing, and it's not fair.
I don't know how expectations work out at the end of the day, whether it kills or fertilize, but I do know that perspective taking helps a lot in dealing with stuff like this.
It's not easy, of course it will be tiring, but maybe in the long run, it will be more worth it, whether in helping the relationship or even in helping yourself to grow, to learn how to love people in general.
Not planning on being love guru, just thought that it would be nice to remind ourselves to walk a mile in someone's moccasins =)
P.S: Just for jokes, you know how girls are (usually) awesome at wearing heels and flats but guys can only wear flats (usually =P)?
Maybe that's why guys find it harder to empathize - cause they have to "walk a mile in the girl's heels" while girls just have to "walk a mile in his Converse shoes" which is much easier. HAHAHAHAH.
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